Those of you who've been around, know I was diagnosed with ADHD in 2024. One of the features of this is something I call Waiting Mode. It basically means I can't do anything if I have an appointment or something scheduled later.
It doesn't matter if my appointment is at 3pm and it's 8am. I will have a level of anxiety looming that prevents being productive on anything.
Because I'm waiting. Because I'm worried I'll get involved in something and forget the appointment. Because even though I have reminders setup on my phone, I don't trust them enough to not go into waiting mode.
There's nothing logical about this, but here I go again. Into Waiting Mode.
I'm writing this on Saturday. My new mattress is supposed to be delivered between 11:30 and 1:30. I am struggling to do anything beyond writing this short blog post, and even while I'm talking about waiting mode, I can feel that low-level anxiety starting.
Do I have everything ready?
I took off all the bedding. I actually wrestled the mattress and box spring off the bed frame so that I could vacuum and dust before the delivery team arrives. I have the bedding in the dryer right now. I have the new covers for the box spring and mattress on hand and organized by size. I have the gripper thing for between the mattress and the box spring folded and ready to go. (I ran it through the dryer to get the wrinkles out and folded it.)
And I'm still worried I forgot to do something even though I can't think of anything to do.
There are things about ADHD that I dislike more than this, but Waiting Mode is pretty annoying.
